Thursday, March 12, 2009

My Comforter...

Food has long been my comforter. I recall finding an audio tape of myself when I was three years old. My first request, after being scolded, was "a cookie and a bottle of milk". It goes way, way back. And, as you know, "old habits are hard to break".

But, break it, I must. For a while now, I have known that God has been calling me to turn to HIM when I need comfort. Seeking comfort in food is not His will for me. Quite honestly, it is probably one of the things in my life that most easily turns my eyes away from Him. It's a "quick fix", but, it doesn't last...and I know that.

As time passes, the convictions come more and more frequently. He has called - again and again. Occasionally, I have listened. Most often, I return to my old friend, and then feel awful.

Yesterday, I had written a prayer request in the Riggs Family Blog, "Pray for Me, Pray for Others" weekly column. One of the the things on my mind as I wrote "...that I follow in His will for me" was my inclination to turn to food.

That afternoon, I headed out to run some errands. As I left, I was feeling a little unsettled. No clear cause, but unsettled, none the less. I had fully intended to drive through McDonald's for lunch - anything and a LARGE FRY sounded really good to me - but as I neared the turn that would bring me there, I thought "nah....".

I headed to Wal*mart. Again and again, I'd picture something in my head that I really wanted - something I was sure would 'settle' me. But, again and again, as I headed in that direction, it was as if He stood between me and whatever it was and said "THAT is not My will for you, Linda..."

I left there with a love-hate battle going on within me. I LOVED it that He would stand between me and the thing that would disconnect me from Him. I know that is a huge gift. I KNOW it is. But, OH how I WANTED it at the time, and HATED that I didn't get it.

Time has passed and I am grateful for the intervention. I pray that it would continue, for every day that it does, brings me closer to a habit broken. Every time I am shown that I won't die if I don't get it, loosens its stronghold on me.

Pray for me....

Be with me, Lord... comfort me...

May I seek You alone...

Pray for MeWe participate in "Pray for Me... Pray for Others" on the Riggs Family Blog. Check out their blog to add your prayer request. Join a community of friends who care about you, and hope you will care about them.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

girl you know this is a mutual battle that we have. you be my accountability and i'll be yours and i am TOTALLY praying for you. love ya