Tuesday, January 27, 2009

There is My Joy...

This is a much more articulate version of what I shared at 2:42. I had this printed out, but summarized it as I remembered: (and I only cried once...)


When I was asked to speak on Sunday night, it was suggested I talk of Joy and God working in my life. Perhaps talking about my blog, or of my interpreting. Instead, I chose to share part of my journey. Likely one of the most pivotal points of my faith journey.

It was in the moment when crisis had hit my marriage and I realized that *I* couldn't fix it, that I was broken enough to surrender and willing to get still enough to really listen. I looked around at my life... at the people I'd met, and the places I'd been. I didn't understand how I had gotten there. But, at that moment I had a brief glimpse of clarity and a change of heart.

I had been told that "God is always with you", that He has plans for me, but I didn't really get it. I hadn't really experienced it.... Then, I realized that He had surrounded me with the people that I needed in my life. The women in my bible study, the women in my yoga class. I was exactly where I was meant to be in that moment. It was then that I first understood. My crazy mixed-up story is a part of His plan.

As I walked through those next months, I searched for Him. "Are You still there?" I'd ask. Without fail, there He was. Guiding, comforting, encouraging. Meeting my needs, and often providing answers to my questions before I asked. It was a truly amazing time. I could go on and on with examples of "All I have needed Thy hand hath provided..."

Life continued to move forward. Times of growth and refinement. Times of rest. Valleys and Mountain tops. Always, Him with me, whether I noticed at the time or not. Not too long ago, we headed into another "growth spurt". I resisted, and learned of His patience. It was following that experience, that I named my blog...though it was a month or so later that I ever considered blogging.

He was leading me to another valley. More learning. More examining my heart. I was tired. I didn't want to grow right then. He spoke, I ignored. I kept busy doing nothing so I didn't have to hear... or so I thought. At the end of a very long weekend of me turning away, I sat on my bed, exhausted. It was if He said "Are you done yet?" Surprised, I said aloud, "My God.... You are stalking me!" And then, I sighed, lowered my head and said "yes... I'm done. Where are we going?"

Day after day, month after month, year after year. There He is. Beside me. With me. Whether I am interpreting on the stage, or sitting to write my blog. So long as my heart is open and my eyes are fixed on Him, I am aware of His presence. When I look away, He is still there. Patiently encouraging me to turn toward Him. It is as we had just sung: "I turn to You and You are always there". That has been my experience.

THERE is my Joy. God working in my life. Valleys. Mountain tops. Doesn't matter. Focusing on Him - be it blogging, interpreting, parenting. Doesn't matter. My favorite sign -"God-connect" - is what matters. THERE is my Joy.

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11 NIV

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