It had been a difficult year. One of the most influential "teachers" in my life had died suddenly, leaving me feeling very lost and alone. No one to hold up the "mirror", gently stand beside me and say "look". Yet I remembered how, again and again, she had told me she loved me, and that she'd always be with me.
I had muddled my way through my grief. Now, a year later, my father had died. As I stood weeping in the shower, after hearing the news, I realized how blessed I had been. I was overcome with peace. Trivialities of family life, gone, I considered my mother's question to me that morning: "Would you like to speak at the funeral?"
Hmmmm. As I stood there, water pouring down, I was showered with memories of things I had learned from my father. Suddenly, all the rules I had rolled my eyes at as a child, held great wisdom. I realized that the challenges that lay before us are not the handicap; surrendering hope, ability and perseverance to your 'difference' is. I compiled the list, and shared these truths at his memorial service. (He'd have liked that!)
I realized that my father loves me - present tense. Though his body is no longer with us, the love that he gave throughout the years remains.
Returning home to New England for the funeral, I pressed my face against the cool glass of the airplane window and looked out over the darkening sky. I could almost hear my friend, Karen laugh and say to me, "I TOLD you I would always love you."
Within my finite human experience, I was beginning to understand the verse, "Love Never Ends".
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1 comment:
Beautiful, thank you Linda! ~L
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