Bittersweet

Let me preface by saying that yes, I know this picture is blurry. The original is blurry, but it is here for a reason. It was included in the slide show.

It was a bittersweet day: Grandma's funeral. Such a mixture of joy and sadness. Joy, because we know that she is in a better place. Joy because we know that she is "free of the cage" that her stroke, eight years ago, trapped her within.

It stole her ability to choose the words she wanted to speak, and her ability to retain certain bits of information. But, it could never take her joy, her love or her gentle, compassionate spirit.

It was a long day for children. Visitation, the funeral itself, and the burial afterward. Three seven year old grandchildren sat as quietly as they could, showing their respect in a way only they can in a situation that was - as my son said - "BOR-ing".

But, as he sat on my lap - all 70 pounds of him - I realized he was listening. He brightened as the pastor read his name as one of the "Joys of her life". But it was during the scripture time that I realized he wasn't lost in the Pokeman DS replay surely going on in his head.

The pastor was describing the person that Grandma was, and summed it up with Proverbs 31. On Mother's Day, our pastor had called 31:28 to the attention of the children. As the pastor read these words during the funeral service, I could see the cogs turning in my boy's brain. All of a sudden, the ton of bricks on my lap sat up straight, turned, looked me straight in the eye and said, "You are blessed".

He is right.... I am blessed... beyond my wildest imaginings, I am blessed.

It's Nice to be Loved

I woke up on Palm Sunday, remembering that I'd forgotten to fill the crock pot with soup mix-ins. We were having a lunch meeting following our church service. I jumped out of bed and ran into the kitchen.

My eyes were still bleary and I hadn't put in my contacts, but as I passed the kitchen window, something caught my eye. At first, all I saw were the bits of white scattered throughout my yard. "oh MAN!" I said, wondering what dog had gotten into whose trash. And then I squinted, and... I recognized the fox.

I put in my contacts, and the "bits of white" turned out to be Styrofoam plates with Easter greetings on them. And there in the middle of my front yard, staring back at me through the window, was the fox.

He's really just an ordinary piece of yard art - perhaps not even that, as he was left by a previous home owner at a house one of my friends bought. When one of our mutual friends saw it for the first time (and second, and I think third as well), she (sarcastically) said "NICE fox..."

Well.... a few weeks ago, when the sarcastic friend was in Florida, the fox switched neighborhoods. Upon her arrival back in TN, there was Mr. Fox - in her "weed bed", as she likes to call it.

This past weekend, the middle and high school youth had a "Discipleship Now" weekend - the boys and the girls, separately studying scriptural aspects of relationships and the benefits of "waiting" (wink, wink, nudge, nudge, know-what-I-mean, know-what-I-mean...).

And, as tradition would have it, they find a little midnight mischief. I was blessed with the plates, some candy filled eggs and The Fox - AND, a few flowers and mulch for my "Friendship Garden" (YES!)

I smiled to myself, and realized how grateful I am to have such a wonderful church family.... mischief and all.

Blessed Beyond My Wildest Imaginings....

I am blessed beyond my wildest imaginings.... truly. It's become my tag-line.... my personal slogan. It's the signature line under my name on my emails. It frequents my Facebook status. It is written on my heart. It is totally, totally amazing.

It was a few weeks back, when I was signing "Your grace is enough...." that the reality moved deeply into my heart. Fortunately, it was during rehearsal. As I signed "Your grace true enough. Your grace true satisfy", my heart skipped a beat - or two. When it started up again, my face was already wet from the tears that had sprung forth. My hands kept on signing, but in my ears, there was no music, only the knowing that "Your grace truly IS enough.... yet, I have been blessed with so much more..."

The first day of February.... I had eluded to some beautiful weather... hadn't anticipated it arriving on the FIRST day of February. Sure enough, it did. I arrived home from church to find that it was as warm outside as it was inside my house. My friends here are all saying "SO... that's not saying much!" (translation - my house is cold.) But 60 degrees inside AND outside, I say we open some windows and let in some fresh air! So I did.

I had the opportunity to peek at the maples and find the very beginnings of some buds. I assessed the work I have to do in the gardens. Major cleanup - and a few inspired additions - to the vegetable garden, adding some mulch to the flower beds. I made note of the continued transplantations as my yard continues to become my yard. I envisioned the addition of some more stones and the completion of a patio area, and the garden edging that will follow.

Hope. Dreams. Literally, new life. Abundant life.

I know it will be work... hard work. I don't mind hard work. I love watching it come to life and evolve. I love the process. I love the connection with God in the midst of the process, and the time to rest with Him when it is complete.

Funny the parallels in my own life. It will be work... hard work. Mostly, I don't mind the work - though honestly, often the physical labor is easier than the emotional / spiritual labor. I love the process, and I love the connection with God in the midst of it... and resting in His presence as each piece is complete.

I am blessed...Beyond my wildest imaginings....