Celebrating the Seasons

It was "Stripe Test" day in my Martial Arts class. I had gone to the morning class, tested, and received my yellow belt. I also attended the evening class, where, after the stripes were awarded, the instructor asked us to "take a knee" before he handed out the belts.

He began to tell a story about "seasons". At the word, I switched into "Yes-God-I'm-listening" mode. That's not to say that I kicked back and took it all in. No, more often, it's like a mini wrestling match inside of me.

One part wants to run - far, far away. "La, la, la.... I can't HEAR you!"

Another focuses in on the concepts being presented and reminds the part that wants to run that this IS applicable. "We've BEEN through Seasons.... It's GOOD, remember?"

Yet another notices whats going on with my body itself. "oh! Heart paused at that word. Now it's racing. Breathe! don't forget to breathe! Yeah, that lump in your throat.... pretty sure it's gonna be there for a bit...."

And the whole while, there is the undercurrent of the Gentle Voice Within saying "Listen. Pay attention. This is important. Listen. Pay attention. This is important. Listen...."

And somehow, through all of that, the message sticks.

"We all experience seasons." I think back through a few of my own: My season of loss, where my dear friend Karen and my father died within months of each other. Not long after was the loss of my marriage and three beloved dogs.

Yet, in that season, I learned much. From Karen and my dad, I learned that "Love never ends". I also felt the presence of God in a way that I had never experienced before. I watched Him bring beauty from ashes as I walked through the divorce process. Faithfully, He showed up when I needed Him most - physically, emotionally, spiritually, financially....

I think back the the birth of my children, and the exhausting season of joy that accompanied them. They've grown and changed and continue to do so.

I felt the ache of conviction when the instructor suggested that perhaps, from time to time, we focus on getting OUT of a current season, rather than being present within it. "I can't wait til they're out of diapers." "I can't wait til school is done." "If I can just get through these next few days, weeks or years, then....." Yeah. Been there.

It's a lesson He's been working on with me. So, Yes, Lord... I hear you. Little by little, I make steps toward your plans for me in that regard.

But, what really stood out for me was when he challenged us to celebrate them and their passing. Live the moments fully while we're in the midst of them. Yet, as their time closes, we step fully into the next season - with joy and purpose.

My season as a white belt has ended, and I have stepped into yellow.

How perfectly timed as He changes some other areas of my life. May I savor the moments and cherish the days. But more importantly, may I follow where He leads, and celebrate the changing of the seasons He brings.

Going in Cold....

"For everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven."

I keep trying to remind myself of that.

I also remind myself that this day would come "one day". There would be "one day" when I absolutely have NO IDEA what is going to be played at church. Typically, I know ahead of time - but I haven't been able to get my hands on the set list this week.

Surprisingly, I'm not completely freaked out by it. Over the past few months, I have found myself checking the list to be sure there were no surprises - songs I'd never interpreted before - and perhaps listening to the music once or twice.

There have also been a few times when there WERE surprises - sometimes even Sunday morning. A little song switch here or there....

It's helped me to realize that I have made some progress in my interpreting skills in the past year. It's also been a good exercise in trust.

I find those times when I have nothing to give - nothing to offer - when I trust in and rely on Him, it all works out in the end.

Guess that's the plan for today...

A Time to Rest... and Rejuvenate!

I have survived January! It's hard to believe... For a brief period of time toward the end of the month, it seemed like it would never end. I would never be able to rest. I was given a few moments - and even a few unexpected moments - but it wasn't enough.

I am exhausted.

But.... February.... a new season. And judging from the calendar, a season of rest. YES! It starts with a kid-free, work-free day. Throw in a week of unused holidays and the end of a clinical rotation, and I'm feeling rejuvenated already!

And... the best thing yet? Even though it is still winter, February is amazing here in Tennessee. There are some beautiful, beautiful days. The first signs of new life can be seen on the trees and in the ground. I get to start piddling in the yard, preparing for gardening. It brings my God-time to a new level.

February brings hope. Hope for new life, for rest, and for precious time tending the Earth, talking with God.



Ecclesiastes 3:2-8

a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted; a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; a time to seek, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away; a time to tear, and a time to sew; keep silence, and a time to speak; a time to love, and a time to hate; a time for war, and a time for peace.

"Not Working"

There are so many things swirling through my head – so many things that ‘aren’t working’, so it seems. Interesting. My perspective. “Not working”. Perhaps they are working just as they should and I just don’t understand it.

Perhaps the change that I feel swirling around me is working just exactly as it needs to. Perhaps the “not working” is a way of showing me that this door is closing. I don't know. The thing that I do know is whenever one door is closed, another one is opened.

Doesn't matter that God opened the door years ago exactly when I needed it! "For everything, there is a season...". Yeah - seems I just said that (oh yeah, I did).

Sometimes I find myself at closed doors wanting to scratch and claw and scream "But you don't understand how important this is to me!!" Ah, but He does. And then I remember all the other things that were "important" to me. The things that I held onto with every bit of strength within me. The things that I can't imagine still being in my life.

So, I try to knock gently against the doors, rather than force my way through. If they open, fabulous, if not, I must wait, be still and watch and wait for the new doors to open. I know they will. Maybe not instantaneously. Maybe they're already open, but I'm so focused on the apparently closing one to notice.

Trusting. Walking in faith. Knowing that if the door is truly closing, another one will open. Either way - open or closed - I will be cared for and loved. It will work for good. Of this I am certain.

A Time for Everything

There truly is a time for everything. Knowing that part, to me, is easy (though sometimes there doesn't seem to be time for anything!). It is knowing what it is time for NOW that is a little more tricky. As is the practice of doing the assigned task at the appointed time.

In our world of multi-tasking and cramming in more obligations than a day can hold, staying on the task at hand is often difficult. How often do I find my mind wandering to the "to do" list, while I should be enjoying my children? Or finishing up the days chores when it is clearly bedtime?

And then there is the concept of change. Of moving from one task to the next. The transition. The letting go of the past, and embracing the future. Those can most effectively be accomplished by living well in the NOW.

Don't hear me wrong, I'm not suggesting I "live well" NOW by living outside of my financial means - that is not "living well". I am reminding myself that the choices I make today affect the consequences that come along tomorrow.

So, I ask, "What is the next right thing for me to do?" Sometimes, it is "breathe". Sometimes it is "pray". Sometimes it is "listen". Sometimes it is "speak". Sometimes it is "run". Sometimes it is "dig your heels in". Whatever it is, I want it to be in His will.

When I take time to be in the now - not pining over the past, or worrying about the future - the answers are clearer. God meets me NOW. In all the seasons of my life. In the Joy, in the Sorrow, the care-free days and in the struggles. "I AM"

May I live well NOW, choose well NOW, experience God NOW.

A Time for Everything

1For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven:
2a time to be born, and a time to die;a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted; 3a time to kill, and a time to heal;a time to break down, and a time to build up; 4a time to weep, and a time to laugh;a time to mourn, and a time to dance; 5a time to cast away stones, and a time to refrain from embracing; gather stones together;a time to embrace, and a time to6a time to seek, and a time to lose;a time to keep, and a time to cast away; 7a time to tear, and a time to sew;a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; 8a time to love, and a time to hate;a time for war, and a time for peace. Ecclesiastes 3:1-8