Celebrating the Seasons

It was "Stripe Test" day in my Martial Arts class. I had gone to the morning class, tested, and received my yellow belt. I also attended the evening class, where, after the stripes were awarded, the instructor asked us to "take a knee" before he handed out the belts.

He began to tell a story about "seasons". At the word, I switched into "Yes-God-I'm-listening" mode. That's not to say that I kicked back and took it all in. No, more often, it's like a mini wrestling match inside of me.

One part wants to run - far, far away. "La, la, la.... I can't HEAR you!"

Another focuses in on the concepts being presented and reminds the part that wants to run that this IS applicable. "We've BEEN through Seasons.... It's GOOD, remember?"

Yet another notices whats going on with my body itself. "oh! Heart paused at that word. Now it's racing. Breathe! don't forget to breathe! Yeah, that lump in your throat.... pretty sure it's gonna be there for a bit...."

And the whole while, there is the undercurrent of the Gentle Voice Within saying "Listen. Pay attention. This is important. Listen. Pay attention. This is important. Listen...."

And somehow, through all of that, the message sticks.

"We all experience seasons." I think back through a few of my own: My season of loss, where my dear friend Karen and my father died within months of each other. Not long after was the loss of my marriage and three beloved dogs.

Yet, in that season, I learned much. From Karen and my dad, I learned that "Love never ends". I also felt the presence of God in a way that I had never experienced before. I watched Him bring beauty from ashes as I walked through the divorce process. Faithfully, He showed up when I needed Him most - physically, emotionally, spiritually, financially....

I think back the the birth of my children, and the exhausting season of joy that accompanied them. They've grown and changed and continue to do so.

I felt the ache of conviction when the instructor suggested that perhaps, from time to time, we focus on getting OUT of a current season, rather than being present within it. "I can't wait til they're out of diapers." "I can't wait til school is done." "If I can just get through these next few days, weeks or years, then....." Yeah. Been there.

It's a lesson He's been working on with me. So, Yes, Lord... I hear you. Little by little, I make steps toward your plans for me in that regard.

But, what really stood out for me was when he challenged us to celebrate them and their passing. Live the moments fully while we're in the midst of them. Yet, as their time closes, we step fully into the next season - with joy and purpose.

My season as a white belt has ended, and I have stepped into yellow.

How perfectly timed as He changes some other areas of my life. May I savor the moments and cherish the days. But more importantly, may I follow where He leads, and celebrate the changing of the seasons He brings.

Oh! THERE You are.....

I was beginning to wonder what was up.

This blog has felt like mere recollections and recounts of my days tied up with a simple expression of gratitude. (Which, is what I do when God and I aren't actively on the steep upward slope of a learning curve... review my day and count my blessings.)

If you can follow this convoluted train of thought, with it's leaps and stretches, you'll know how I arrived where I am now.

I'd walked the dog and been to my Mixed Martial Arts (MMA)class. I was preparing to shower before my last carpool pickup of the school year. Sometimes in those mindless moments of every routine, I am inspired with a topic for the blog. Nothing.

I considered retelling the story of the inspiration for the title. Nah.

I recalled one woman in my class showing pictures of a body-building friend of hers. She explaining that her focus on body-building began after a relationship ending.

Several random conversations and emails crossed my mind - continuing ed, ending projects, beginning projects, to do's...

I thought to the year of my divorce and the moment I knew that life was about to change dramatically. "What did I do?" I asked silently, knowing full well it hadn't been body-building. "I ran to God," has always been my reply.

And then I realized... no.... I didn't. I didn't run. I dropped my head as I let go of my plans and my ideas about my marriage and how it could be saved. When I turned, I walked smack-dab into Him. RIGHT THERE. He'd always been right there. And then I sat, and He did.

From there, some of the random conversations and emails rearranged themselves in my mind.

A recent prayer that I had whispered in a moment of feeling like I needed "just a little something" was whispered back to me. I paused. Oh! That's what You've been up to!

Once again, I turn and walk smack-dab into the midst of God and His choreography. I hope I was on cue.

(and I wonder what other prayers I have whispered recently.....)

Half way there...

I don't know how I got there... exactly. Generally, I do: ate more, exercised less. But, there's no clear day when it happened.

There's a pretty clear day when it changed, though. I started my MMA in March. And things started changing. Little by little. Aside from the exercise itself - the kicking, the punching, the "jumping rope" (imaginary rope) - there is the mindset.

There is something about saying "I will avoid anything that will reduce my mental growth or my physical health" twice a week. After a while, it starts to stick.

And so do the little lifestyle changes. Especially the "easy" ones. Raising the priority of my walks and planning my meals.

And THEN the physical changes kick in. The pants get looser. The muscles get defined.

And THEN, I realize - as I'm turning down an offer for free pizza (and later, free cookies!) - I'm half-way through my weight loss goal! YES!

Thank You God!

Kicking and Punching and Screaming

Sunday was a hard day. It would have been a wedding anniversary - I guess technically, it still is... we just don't celebrate.

Things were going fine until my turn to interpret the last part of the sermon. The pastor had been talking about Abram/Abraham and his call to leave his home. When I stood, he explained that call a little further with these words: "Forsake the past, focus on the Divine". My mentor snickered aloud.

She knew about the wedding the day before, and God's rather in-my-face presence there. She knew the significance of the present day. We both picked up on the "perfect timing" of this sermon.

My response wasn't nearly as amused. Especially after my failed errand run immediately following church.

After the wedding reception, we swung by a sports shop and picked up the kicking/punching training bag I wanted. I got it home and began to fill the base with water, when I realized it was cracked.

Our attempt to return it was in vain. They didn't have one in stock. Nor did their competition.

I planned to work some drills from my Karate/MMA class.... with the bag. I felt defeated.

I couldn't eat the feelings away, nor could I kick/punch them away.

I spent what was left of our afternoon in a minimalist mode. I had plenty to do, but no energy to do it. I elected to rest for the hour before our small group meeting that evening.

Returning home, I felt a little refreshed, and realized.... I still had my gloves. I still had the blow up punching bag I'd bought for the kids. I could focus on accuracy rather than power. So I did.

I worked some kicking drills and some punching drills. I enlisted the help of my daughter to call our random numbers between 1 and 4. With each number, I threw the punch combination that was associated with it.

I yelled and I kicked and I punched.

My daughter laughed.

It is good medicine.