Some TIme in The Yard

It was a beautiful day. After church and lunch, I had an opportunity to work in the yard.

It's been a while... too long.

There is something to be said for the peace and quiet of pulling grass out of a flower bed.

God and I have an opportunity to talk.

Which is good.... I need some time to listen.

I look forward to full-fledged autumn.

I have much to do in the yard.

And enjoy the opportunity to be quiet and listen.

Back in the Saddle

Boy was it good to be back in the saddle. I haven't been on a horse since before my kids were born. It's been at least a decade.

But one day, sort of out of the blue, I said to a friend, "... if you ever need a riding buddy....."

My experience is limited - no more than a dozen times have I sat on the back of a horse. It has always been thoroughly enjoyable. I've loved it.

This time was no exception.

Yes, I have more of the images of the people I've cared for in the land of Trauma, following their equine accidents stored in the recesses of my brain, but still. Up I went. And, I loved it.

I'm grateful for this friendship, and this opportunity. I'm grateful for the internal nudge that put the request to ride out there.

Next time... more cantering.

The Marriage Series....uh-ho...

We have begun a sermon series at church on marriage. I willingly admit that I am a member of the group which my pastor describes as "Divorced, with no intentions of ever marrying again". I also fully acknowledge that God may have other plans for me, and after I run for a while, I'll likely come around to His idea. But, for the time being, in this season of life as Mom-to-a-pair-of-school-aged-children, I am content as I am.

As I sit in the congregation, or stand interpreting, I find I can relate to many, many things that are said. I also find myself thinking "OH! If only [my ex] could hear this...." Would he believe it? Would he accept it? I don't know...

I do know that the series will be life-changing for me. I can sense that already. I know there is much for me to learn. Much for me to accept. Much to examine.

Arriving home this past Sunday, I emailed some thoughts to a friend of mine. I also asked for prayer that my heart would be open to what He has to tell me, to show me, to teach me. I prayed the same, and added a request that I be willing to have those parts that need extracting removed, changed and replaced with something new.

In my email, I also expressed some nervous anticipation, as I was about to mow my grass. Mowing is one of those mindless tasks, with plenty of "white noise" that helps me more easily clear my mind of the to do list and the internal chatter. Mowing is one of those times when He and I talk... and mostly, I listen.

As I began, I repeated my prayer for a willing, open heart - ears to hear, eyes to see, and the ability to let go of my ideas and let Him change me as He sees fit.

I thanked Him for the breeze, which made the mid-80's temperatures more tolerable. And then, I shut up. Back and forth across my front yard, I walked, changing the clover-field into a well-kept looking yard, one row at a time.

The breeze kicked up again, brushing the hair out of my eyes, and I "heard":

"Linda, I do not want to talk to you right now about your most recent marriage... I want to talk with you about your first marriage...."

I stopped dead in my tracks.

Uh-ho....

Guilty as charged....

It will be a very, VERY interesting series. Pray for me....

Bring on the Clarity

It is becoming increasingly clear where lines are needing to be drawn. The calendar is clearing itself, there is less waffling about "do I really want to get rid of this, or should I just keep it?", and there are some clearer boundaries within a few relationships here and there. All of these are needing to happen!

Bring on the clarity, Lord... I am listening.

Where You lead, I will follow...